“Oh… Could you please give this to Bui Chap for me?”
I held the pale pink love letter.
This was the eleventh love letter this month.
Everyone knew Bui Chap and I were childhood sweethearts, and that he could like anyone else but would never like me. So, they confidently entrusted me with delivering their love letters.
But as usual, Bui Chap took the letter, furrowed his brows, wondering who the girl was, then snorted, “My standards aren’t that low.”
He tossed the love letter into my lap: “It’s on your level; I can’t reach that low.”
His friends burst out laughing, and Bui Chap’s gaze at me was full of sarcasm.
Why?
Because the first love letter Bui Chap ever tore up was mine.
2
Bui Chap and I were childhood sweethearts. Our parents were very close, so naturally, everyone assumed our relationship was just as good.
At first, it really was good. Until one time there was… an accidental incident.
While playing truth or dare, Bui Chap got a dare. Someone asked if he dared to kiss me.
Back then, we were naive but very competitive. He asked me, “Do you mind?”
Before I could even react, he had already kissed me.
“Tch, that’s all there is to it.”
From that moment on, I was no longer the noble flower in others’ eyes, the most well-behaved girl in class.
Instead, I was one of Bui Chap’s possessions.
3
Bui Chap’s academic performance wasn’t great. So, his parents wanted me to tutor him.
But on the day he and I were supposed to meet at the library, I stood alone at the bus stop waiting for him for nearly an hour. Finally, I saw a new update on his social media feed: he had won ten consecutive games at the internet cafe. I immediately called a taxi and went there.
Cigarette smoke swirled in the cafe, and there was even a girl sitting on Bui Chap’s lap. The girls were cheering him on, and he suddenly turned his head, looked straight into my eyes, and gave me a malicious smile.
4
“Chu Tuyen, damn it, are you crazy?”
Bui Chap got an earful from his parents and had all his pocket money confiscated. He couldn’t go to the internet cafe anymore, because I had reported him.
“You shouldn’t go to those places.” I enunciated each word.
At that time, I hid my unrequited feelings for him, stubbornly believing that what I was doing was for his own good. But all I got in return was his growing hatred.
Bui Chap squeezed my chin: “What right do you have to meddle in my affairs? Just because we kissed once, you think you’re my girlfriend? How ridiculous!”
5
Bui Chap had a very handsome face, and coupled with his arrogant and unruly personality, he quickly attracted everyone’s attention at school. Many girls wanted to win him over, and he never refused, being promiscuous and fickle.
With a casual flick of his wrist, he bounced a ball, his excellent technique drawing cheers from the entire stands. But Bui Chap, without any regard, forcefully threw the ball towards me, without a moment’s hesitation.
“Sorry.” He indifferently watched me clutch my aching arm, uttering an apology as fleeting as the wind: “You wouldn’t hold a grudge against me, would you, my childhood sweetheart?”
And so, everyone knew he hated me.
6
Over time, I also accepted this truth.
I put away the love letters that held a young girl’s feelings for Bui Chap, no longer wanting to care about him. But in front of our parents, we still had to pretend to be happy and harmonious.
“Bui Chap’s grades have improved lately. That must be all thanks to Chu Tuyen. I’ve cut up some fruit, kids, have some.” Bui Chap’s mother smiled brightly. He was in a great mood too, though he shot me a silent, warning glance.
Of course, his improved grades had nothing to do with me. It was because he’d recently started dating the class beauty queen – a girl with excellent grades. They often “studied together” after school, but the other day, I accidentally saw them kissing in a classroom.
7
I had already kicked Bui Chap out of my world, but we went to the same school, so we were bound to run into each other.
As the top student in the entire grade, I had just received the City’s Outstanding Student award, and was scheduled to give a speech on stage the next day. So, after school, I stayed in class, planning to meet the teacher to practice my speech for the whole school.
As I walked past an empty meeting room, soft, ambiguous sounds emanated from inside. I turned my head, and through a gap in the window curtains, my eyes met Bui Chap’s.
He was pressing a girl against a chair. He looked up and saw me. At that moment, I knew he’d hold it against me again.
8
Bui Chap’s girlfriend was the school’s beauty queen, ranked second in the entire grade, and also my classmate. But after she started dating Bui Chap, her grades began to plummet uncontrollably, quickly catching the teachers’ attention. They called me in and asked, “Has she been acting unusually lately? Or has she been associating with bad influences?”
I just shook my head, “I don’t know.”
But secrets can’t be kept forever. For some reason, the fact that the teachers had questioned me got out. Bui Chap and the beauty queen’s relationship was also exposed, and his parents found out. His father, who had a hot temper, dragged him home and gave him a beating.
That day, no one was home at my place. Bui Chap stormed into my room.
“I underestimated you.”
He shoved me. I lost my balance and bumped into my desk. A drawer fell out, and its contents spilled onto the floor.
Bui Chap lightly squeezed my wrist, because we both saw the pink love letter that had fallen to the ground. On the letter were my name and Bui Chap’s, and he was certainly familiar with my handwriting.
9
“Oh, so you were jealous?” Bui Chap’s expression was as if he’d just realized something.
He tore up the letter and held me tightly.
I struggled, “I didn’t tell on you!”
He frowned, “There’s something more important now.”
Bui Chap picked up the scissors from the desk and cut off a lock of my hair. “Chu Tuyen, I’d rather love a dog than love you.”
10
Bui Chap used that lock of my hair to score points with the school’s beauty queen, but that couldn’t change the fact that his father made him transfer schools.
The day Bui Chap left, the beauty queen cried for a long time. I thought their love would last forever, but only a few days later, the beauty queen received a photo of Bui Chap being intimate with another girl.
And that lock of hair, along with my ragged ends, marked the end of that chapter.
11
Later, the beauty queen’s grades plummeted into an abyss. She asked me to help her arrange a meeting with Bui Chap, wanting to see him just one more time. I couldn’t refuse.
Unexpectedly, the day I went to meet Bui Chap, he was completely drunk in a bar. He recognized me and forced me to stay.
“Chu Tuyen, isn’t this exactly what you wanted to see?” His smile looked truly terrifying.
So, the next day, the beauty queen received a photo. It was a photo of Bui Chap forcibly kissing me in that bar.
12
The school beauty and I fell out. When word of this got out, I immediately became the target of everyone's scorn.
"I was still wondering why he made the accusation; turns out it was because he loved Bùi Chấp but couldn't have him?"
"Yeah, he really made out this time. He clearly went to help them make up, but then he seized the chance to take their place. Isn't that sickening?"
I became isolated.
But what was ironic was that they seemed to have forgotten Bùi Chấp's philandering and fickle nature.
13
The day I transferred schools, Bùi Chấp made a point of coming to mock me: "What, you couldn't take it anymore?"
His words were dripping with sarcasm: "Chu Tuyền, serves you right."
I just nodded indifferently: "Serves you right too."
Bùi Chấp burst into laughter. He whispered in my ear: "But it's okay. Now, in their eyes, aren't we both wolves in sheep's clothing, a match made in heaven?"
Really? Why do I feel like I'm starting to hate him?